Things I’ve learned from being a mixed up person in a mixed up world

1. Whatever the problem is, the root of the problem is fear. So you think someone has been insulting, mean, inconsiderate, egotistical, disrespectful, or dismissive? The problem is none of the above. The problem is fear. The person you have a problem with is driven by fear. Your reaction is driven by fear. Fear is the one thing standing in the way of positive human interaction. We are all breathing bundles of insecurity. Once we recognize that, we recognize our shared humanity, regardless of our differences.
2. The way to inner peace is through forgiving others. “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us,” says the Lord’s Prayer, and there’s a reason we are supposed to forgive others. This is the path to our own freedom from inner conflict. This is the way to the light. This is what redemption is.
3. It isn’t easy to forgive when we have been hurt, and it is even harder to keep forgiving when our offer of forgiveness has no impact on the other person’s behavior. Our forgiveness will not change the situation or the other person. That doesn’t matter. It will change us. We can’t forgive ourselves before we forgive others, and we can’t move on before we’ve forgiven ourselves. We have to forgive if we want to truly live.
4. You have to give to receive, and sometimes you have to give without receiving. That’s okay. It’s always better to be a giver. We were created to serve others, and when we don’t fulfill this role, we don’t feel fulfilled. We have to give our time and our talents and our hearts to others if we want to profit from these things ourselves.
5. The way we judge others is the way we judge ourselves. The way we talk to or about others is the way we believe we deserve to be talked to or about. The flaws we notice in others are the ones we are most concerned about in ourselves. We ought to be kinder and more generous to others because that is the only way to be kinder and more generous to ourselves.
6. The best revenge really is happiness. If you want to be happy, just get out there every day and love every minute of your very precious life. Time flies whether you are having fun our not. You might as well enjoy it.
7. Revenge is the wrong word because revenge comes from a place of bitterness, and there is no room for bitterness in a happy life. Just get out there and love life. Include as many people as you can in your love for life. You may have to love life in spite of some people, but nothing that is done to spite another person is love. Forget the spite. Just love.