{"id":242,"date":"2010-02-02T19:24:44","date_gmt":"2010-02-03T02:24:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.writerlyhaphazardry.net\/?p=242"},"modified":"2010-02-02T19:24:44","modified_gmt":"2010-02-03T02:24:44","slug":"the-daily-blog","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.writerlyhaphazardry.net\/?p=242","title":{"rendered":"The Daily Blog"},"content":{"rendered":"

I’m not sure I can do it. I was sure from the start that I wouldn’t make it to 365 consecutive blogging days without a break. My previous record was about 70 days, and I thought maybe I could beat that. Now I’m not sure. I’m pulled in too many directions, feeling too worn down. I have plenty to blog about. I’ve read books I haven’t mentioned, thought up ideas I haven’t explored. Material abounds but not focus, drive, or particular purpose in continuing to blog daily when I feel so tired and pulled apart. I promised no one but myself, and that’s a promise that can be broken at any point.<\/p>\n

This is day 33. It’s a Tuesday, so I was supposed to write a poem, but I won’t because I only just now remembered that it was Tuesday at all, much less the day on which I had thought I might write poems. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe next week. Not today.<\/p>\n

I wonder why I would keep going, or why I wouldn’t be more lenient with myself about days off. People even take days off from their vows for Lent. Why not expect or even schedule days off?<\/p>\n

No reason at all. I have only the perverse thing inside that wants to assure itself it spends time each day writing. I have fooled that thing, though, by posting pictures or otherwise evading writing as duty. It is not a duty. It is merely a desire.<\/p>\n

And so because I am too tired and have too much else on my mind to say much more today than maybe I will quit this tomorrow, or maybe I won’t, I will leave you with this.<\/p>\n

Cornbread<\/p>\n

\"IMG_1670\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Camellia<\/p>\n

\"IMG_1643\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Apropos of nothing. Except…<\/p>\n

I remembered to make cornbread because I mentioned cornbread yesterday in a blog post. That’s all. Not much there to remark upon.<\/p>\n

The flowers I saw in the cemetery when I went for a walk this afternoon. I took other pictures, but I don’t want to post them because it seems to me that the losses are too fresh in that cemetery. I don’t want to disturb them. It is not the same at all as pictures from a historic cemetery where the pain of loss is a hundred years or more in the past.<\/p>\n

Maybe I should have gone in a different direction today. Maybe I should have looked for something to cheer myself up or calm the stress that I feel. But there in the cemetery among the fresh losses I felt I had no right to even see I also saw the only sign of life I’ve run across lately at all. Where else are the flowers in bloom on February 2 after a cold front has just been through?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I’m not sure I can do it. I was sure<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[51],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-242","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-the-blog"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.writerlyhaphazardry.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/242","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.writerlyhaphazardry.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.writerlyhaphazardry.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.writerlyhaphazardry.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.writerlyhaphazardry.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=242"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.writerlyhaphazardry.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/242\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.writerlyhaphazardry.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=242"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.writerlyhaphazardry.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=242"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.writerlyhaphazardry.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=242"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}